I finally watched When Harry Met Sally

Being the hopeless romantic that I am, this film has always been on my must-watch list, particularly because I love me a friends-to-lovers trope. The tension, the laughter, the subtle glances, the gentle touches, the yearning... absolutely!

This 1989 film delved into the story of two friends who eventually became lovers, also touching on the idea that men can't be friends with women they find attractive, which I personally find to be a nuanced topic I won't be discussing further in this blog post.

At the end of the film, Harry tells Sally, "I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with someone, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible." This line captures the essence of what I want to explore: the romantic feeling of urgency that both partners should have towards each other. I've experienced this urgency, but it often fades quickly when there are no solid roots, leading me to believe that while urgency is important, it must be complemented by stability.

One might wonder how a sense of urgency can exist in a slow-burn relationship. I believe that stability is what we should desire most, and this is something I observed in Harry and Sally. They could depend on themselves but weren't prepared to address their feelings for each other, as they appreciated the security of their friendship without romantic involvement. Their sense of urgency towards each other started as platonic and eventually evolved into romance, allowing stability to form.

They both once experienced a paradox of a love that was genuine, but not necessarily meant to be pursued during their years of friendship.

Unrelated, but it reminds me of the film "Past Lives" (which I didn't particularly enjoy, but it offered interesting insights). The conflict of choosing between a life once lived, filled with "what ifs," and the current life of stability and reality.

Throughout the film, I often see them deciding which reality they preferred, from the blind date scenes to when Sally informed Harry she had a date. The lingering feelings, unspoken words, and subtle encouragement masking the longing were all present. They opted for the reality of safety until safety was no longer the best choice.

This is definitely going into my comfort rewatch collection. Have you seen When Harry Met Sally, and are you a fan of slow-burn, or do you prefer getting straight to the point?